2004.06.11 - Elgin Community College

[ineedsleep]

This Friday, June 11th @ the Elgin Community College

Relay for Life benefit PARTEEE BASH!!!

Goes all night from 6 PM to 6 AM (I Need Sleep plays at 4 AM)

Come spend the night with us and play glow-in-the-dark volleyball, moonjumpers, ice cream eating contests, Survivor games and much more FREE stuff.

Bands will be playing all night long.

Go to here for more information.

Be there or be lame and stay in bed and sleep like a wuss... DON'T YOU WANT TO CURE CANCER???


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2N Music

[xavii]

sounds like a lock in to me. where the priests touch you and you try to dance with that girl you like but she laughs at you when you get the balls to ask and then her football player boyfriend pushes you down and spills rootbeer on your head and the whole middle school laughs at you and when you try to run away you slip in the rootbeer and the only person to help you up is the ugly girl in class who looks at you in that "i like you but i'm ugly" look and you pull your arm away once you regain balance and tell her to get off you and finally run off with everyone pointing and laughing and you then find the pay phone and call your mom collect and instead of having her accept you cry into the receiver "MOM IT'S BOB COME PICK ME UP" and she declines the charges and doesn't come after an hour and you wait outside as it starts to rain and walk home in the rain to find her passed out on the sofa with a spilled glass of boxed wine only to fall asleep sobbing aloud in bed beating off to the visage of the girl who turned you down eating out the ugly girl in class while she blows the football player and you take her from behind.

sounds like FUN.

[samiamnot]

Originally posted by xavii@Jun 8 2004, 11:47 PM
sounds like a lock in to me. where the priests touch you and you try to dance with that girl you like but she laughs at you when you get the balls to ask and then her football player boyfriend pushes you down and spills rootbeer on your head and the whole middle school laughs at you and when you try to run away you slip in the rootbeer and the only person to help you up is the ugly girl in class who looks at you in that "i like you but i'm ugly" look and you pull your arm away once you regain balance and tell her to get off you and finally run off with everyone pointing and laughing and you then find the pay phone and call your mom collect and instead of having her accept you cry into the receiver "MOM IT'S BOB COME PICK ME UP" and she declines the charges and doesn't come after an hour and you wait outside as it starts to rain and walk home in the rain to find her passed out on the sofa with a spilled glass of boxed wine only to fall asleep sobbing aloud in bed beating off to the visage of the girl who turned you down eating out the ugly girl in class while she blows the football player and you take her from behind.

sounds like FUN.

i cant believe i read all that. i couldve spent that minute doing somthing constuctive. it had some funny parts. i dont mean to sound like an ass but was that necessary?

[xavii]

There once was a little kid named Billy who loved clowns. I mean LOVED them. He had posters of them all over his wall and pictures of them everywhere. One day his parents took him to the Circus to see all of the clowns. He was so excited! He never saw one up close before! In the middle of the show, a tiny little car came out and out came 20 clowns! He was cheering so loud he couldn't speak for a couple minutes. Just then, the Leader of the Clowns took a microphone and asked for a volunteer. Billy raised his hand and shouted ''Me! Me!'' The clown looked around and said ''You!'' as he pointed at Billy. He was so happy!

Billy joined the clown on the floor. The clown looked down at him and asked, ''Are you the horse's nose?'' Billy said ''No...'' ''Are you the horse's ears?'' ''No...'' Then the clown got an evil look in his eye as he said ''Then you must be the horse's ass!'' The whole tent shook with laughter, and Billy cried his eyes out. He couldn't believe a clown made fun of him like that! He swore revenge!

Billy grew up, he went to college, got a job, got married, and had a few kids, but still never forgot what that clown did to him. One morning he saw an ad in the paper for the same circus, and decided to go. He knew the PERFECT insult to get him back! When he told his wife and kids he was going his kids asked if they could goto the circus with him. He calmly said ''No. Daddy has something he needs to do there.'' In the middle of the show, a little car came out and out came about 20 clowns. The crowd cheered, except for Billy. The Leader of the Clowns took a microphone. It was the same Clown! Billy was so excited that he could now get revenge!

The clown asked for a volunteer. Billy calmly raised his hand. The clown picked him! Billy joined the clown on the floor. The clown said ''Are you the horse's nose?'' Billy stayed calm and said ''No.'' The clown asked ''Are you the horse's ears?'' Billy replied ''No.'' Then the clown said ''Then you must be the horse's ass!'' Billy knew his time had come. As the crowd laughed and everyone cheered, his anger grew. Now was the time for revenge. He looked deep into the clown's eyes and said... "|f*ck| YOU CLOWN!@#$#@''

[xavii]

the aristocrats done by south park

also

two penguins are sitting in a bathtub, one says "can you please pass the soap?" and the other says


NO SOAP, RADIO!